Boss-Employee-Appraisal-Frustration

Boss:
Arz kiya hai.........-.....
Office may Kaam hote hain...
Galtiyo ka Sama hota hai....
Aise mausam mein hi to PERFORMANCE jawan hota hai....
Dil ki khunnas BOSS jabaan se nahi kehte...
Ye fasana to appraisal mein bayan hota hai.... (Wah)

Employee's reply...
Arz kiya hai.........-.....
Appraisal hote hain...
Disappointment ka sama hota hai...
Aise mausam mein hi to Attrition jawan hota hai....
Dil ki khunnas HUM jabaan se nahi kehte...
Ye fasana to resignation se bayan hota hai.... (wah wah ... wah wah ....wah wah)

Amazing Baby- World record- 11months Infant

Age: 11 Months , Weight: 52.5kg
Per Day Diet: 1 kg Wheat Flour and 5 litres Milk
Birth Place: India-Rajasthan

Ice berg

This is awesome! This came from a Rig Manager for Global Marine Drilling in St. Johns, Newfoundland. They actually have to divert the path of these things away from the rig by towing them with ships! In this particular case the water was calm, & the sun was almost directly overhead so that the diver was able to get into the water and click this pic. Clear water huh? They estimated the weight at 300,000,000 tons. And now we know why they say one picture is worth 1000 words..

INDIAN SOFTWARE ENGINEER - A BitterReality...

ONE BEDROOM FLAT... WRITTEN BY AN INDIAN SOFTWARE ENGINEER
==================
As the dream of most parents I had acquired a degree in Software
Engineering and joined a company based in USA , the land of braves and
opportunity. When I arrived in the USA , it was as if a dream had come true.

Here at last I was in the place where I want to be. I decided I would be
staying in this country for about Five years in which time I would have
earned enough money to settle down in India .

My father was a government employee and after his retirement, the only
asset he could acquire was a decent one bedroom flat.

I wanted to do some thing more than him. I started feeling homesick and
lonely as the time passed. I used to call home and speak to my parents
every week using cheap international phone cards. Two years passed, two
years of Burgers at McDonald's and pizzas and discos and 2 years
watching the foreign exchange rate getting happy whenever the Rupee
value went down.

Finally I decided to get married. Told my parents that I have only 10
days of holidays and everything must be done within these 10 days. I got
my ticket booked in the cheapest flight. Was jubilant and was actually
enjoying hopping for gifts for all my friends back home. If I miss
anyone then there will be talks. After reaching home I spent home one
week going through all the photographs of girls and as the time was
getting shorter I was forced to select one candidate.

In-laws told me, to my surprise, that I would have to get married in 2-3
days, as I will not get anymore holidays. After the marriage, it was
time to return to USA , after giving some money to my parents and telling
the neighbors to look after them, we returned to USA .

My wife enjoyed this country for about two months and then she started
feeling lonely. The frequency of calling India increased to twice in a
week sometimes 3 times a week. Our savings started diminishing.
After two more years we started to have kids. Two lovely kids, a boy and a
girl, were gifted to us by the almighty. Every time I spoke to my parents, they
asked me to come to India so that they can see their grand-children.

Every year I decide to go to India .. But part work part monetary
conditions prevented it. Years went by and visiting India was a distant
dream. Then suddenly one day I got a message that my parents were
seriously sick. I tried but I couldn't get any holidays and thus could
not go to India .. The next message I got was my parents had passed away
and as there was no one to do the last rights the society members had
done whatever they could. I was depressed. My parents had passed away
without seeing their grand children.

After couple more years passed away, much to my children's dislike and
my wife's joy we returned to India to settle down. I started to look for
a suitable property, but to my dismay my savings were short and the
property prices had gone up during all these years. I had to return to
the USA ..

My wife refused to come back with me and my children refused to stay in
India .. My 2 children and I returned to USA after promising my wife I
would be back for good after two years.

Time passed by, my daughter decided to get married to an American and my
son was happy living in USA .. I decided that had enough and wound-up
every thing and returned to India . I had just enough money to buy a
decent 02 bedroom flat in a well-developed locality.

Now I am 60 years old and the only time I go out of the flat is for the
routine visit to the nearby temple. My faithful wife has also left me
and gone to the holy abode.

Sometimes I wondered was it worth all this? My father, even after
staying in India , had a house to his name and I too have the same
nothing more.

I lost my parents and children for just ONE EXTRA BEDROOM.

Looking out from the window I see a lot of children dancing.
This damned cable TV has spoiled our new generation and these
Children are losing their values and culture because of it. I get
Occasional cards from my children asking I am alright. Well at least they remember me.

Now perhaps after I die it will be the neighbors again who will be
Performing my last rights, God Bless them. But the question still
remains 'was all this worth it?'

I am still searching for an answer.................!!!

Food for thought - Test

Bill Gates Session

Bill Gates organized an enormous session to recruit a new Chairman for Microsoft Europe. 5000 candidates assembled in a large room. One candidate is Arun Mhatre an Indian (Mumbai) guy.

Bill Gates thanked all the candidates for coming and asking those who do not know JAVA program to leave.2000 people leave the room. Arun says to himself, 'I do not know JAVA but I have nothing to lose if I stay. I'll give it a try'

Bill Gates asked the candidates who never had experience of managing more than 100 people to leave. 2000 people leave the room. Arun says to himself ' I never managed anybody by myself but I have nothing to lose if I stay. What can happen to me?' So he stays.

Then Bill Gates asked candidates who do not have management diplomas to leave. 500 people leave the room. Arun says to himself, 'I left school at 15 but what have I got to lose?' So he stays in the room.

Lastly, Bill Gates asked the candidates who do not speak Serbo - Croat to leave. 498 people leave the room. Arun says to himself, ' I do not speak one word of Serbo - Croat but what do I have to lose?' So he stays and finds himself with one other candidate. Everyone else has gone.

Bill Gates joined them and said 'Apparently you are the only two candidates who speak Serbo - Croat, so I'd now like to hear you have a conversation together in that language.' Calmly, Arun turns to the other candidate and says 'Kaisa hai re tu' The other candidate answers 'Accha hai re'

:) hahah

Check it out in UNIX-1752 calender

Have u ever seen the calendar for September 1752??? If you are working in UNIX, try this out. At $ prompt, type: cal 9 1752 Surprised????

See the explanation for what you
see.Isn't the output queer?

A month with whole of eleven days missing. This was
the ti me England shifted from Roman Julian Calendar to the Gregorian calendar,
and the king of England ordered those 11 days to be wiped off the face of the
month of September of 1752. (What couldn't a King do in those days?!) And yes,
the workers worked for 11 days less, but got paid for the entire 30 days. And
that's how "Paid Leave" was born.