Dozen best logics

1. If time doesn't wait for you, don't worry!Just remove the damn battery from the clock and Enjoy life!

2. Expecting the world to treat u fairly coz u r a good person is likeexpecting the lion not to attack u coz u r a vegetarian.Think about it.

3. Beauty isn't measured by outer appearance and what clothes we wear,but what we are inside .. So, try going out naked tomorrow and see theadmiration!

4. Don't walk as if you rule the world,walk as if you don't care who rules the world!That's called Attitude…! Keep on rocking!

5. Every lady hopesthat her daughter will marry a better man than she didand is convinced that her son will never find a wife as good as his fatherdid!!!

6. He was a good man. He never smoked, drank had no affair.When he died, the insurance company refused the claim.They said, he who never lived, cannot die!

7. A man threw his wife in a pond of Crocodiles?He's now being harassed by the Animal Rights Activists for being cruel tothe Crocodiles!

8. So many options for suicide:Poison, sleeping pills, hanging,jumping from a building, lying on train tracks,but we chose Marriage, slow sure!

9. Only 20 percent boys have brains, rest has girlfriends!

10. All desirable things in life are eitherillegal, banned, expensive or married to someone else!

11. Laziness is our biggest enemy- Jawaharlal NehruWe should learn to love our enemies- Mahatma GandhiAb aap bataaye kiski sune bapu di ya chacha di??? (which one you choose?)

12. 10% of road accidents are due to drunken driving.Which makes it a logical statement that90% of accidents are due to driving without drinking!

An Ex-Wife's Revenge

She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.

On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar and a bottle of Chardonnay. When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp dipped in caviar, into the hollow of the curtain rods.She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days. Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were steamed. Air Fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days, and in the end even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting. Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit. Repairmen refused to work in the house. The maid quit. Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.

A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out and eventually even the local realtors refused to return their calls. Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place. The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and said that she missed her old home terribly, and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back. Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad t he smell was, he agreed on a Price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if she were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home.... ........including the curtain rods.

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Heeeeeeeeehe If only all women could be that smart....we would have ruled the world

No Work at office - Try these

If you find it very boring in the office, here are some tips:
1. Form a detective agency to find out who is quitting next.

2. Make blank calls to your Boss.

3. Send mails from lotus notes (outlook)to your internet mail (and immediately get to the internet and see who reaches first, you or your mail?)and read them there, and note down the time they take to reach there.Then do vice versa.............!!

4. Rearrange the furniture, i.e. flick someone else's chair just to irritate him/her.

5. Count your fingers (and toes if you still get bored).

6. Watch other people changing their facial ex-pressions whileworking and try changing your ex-pressions also.

7. Try to stretch status meetings as longer as possible, just by asking silly doubts.

8. Make faces at strangers in office.

9. Have a two and hlaf hours lunch; it's a big social occasion.

10. Learn to whistle.

11. Revise last week's newspaper.

12. Hold "How fast my computer boots" competitions.

13. Practice aiming the coffee cup into the dustbin.

14. Compile "How to waste your day"

15. Pick up phone and dial non-existing nos.

16. Have work breaks in between tea.

17. Count maximum no of applications your computer can open at time(till it finally crashes).

18. For Win NT/95 users....Move things to Recycle bin and restore them.. Then repeat this process.

19. Look at someone & try to imagine how(s) he might have looked when(s) he was 5 years old.

20. After trying everything...when you are tried....Make use of the comfortable chair and table provided and take a nap.

Excellence

A German once visited a temple under construction where he saw a sculptormaking an idol of God. Suddenly he noticed a similar idol lying nearby.Surprised, he asked the sculptor, "Do you need two statues of the sameidol?" "No," said the sculptor without looking up, "We need only one, butthe first one got damaged at the last stage." The gentleman examined theidol and found no apparent damage. "Where is the damage?" he asked. "Thereis a scratch on the nose of the idol." said the sculptor, still busy withhis work. "Where are you going to install the idol?"The sculptor replied that it would be installed on a pillar twenty feethigh. "If the idol is that far, who is going to know that there is ascratch on the nose?" the gentleman asked. The sculptor stopped his work,looked up at the gentleman, smiled and said, "I will know it."The desire to excel is exclusive of the fact whether someone elseappreciates it or not. "Excellence" is a drive from inside, not outside.Excellence is not for someone else to notice but for your own satisfactionand efficiency...

Register for Vote online - Its simple and Quick

Tomorrow is the last day to register as voters. Please read the attached document to know three easy ways to register as a voter. Log onto www.letsvote.in for more details about the various campaigns taken up to educate/ sensitize the professionals across Hyderabad. Hurry up- do not lose any time.

Let’s do our bit to build our country, our society, and our community, by registering for vote, and casting our vote, and be proud to have contributed to our nation-building by making our voice heard.
India, the world’s largest democracy, has scope to hold the flag higher, provided most of the citizens, that is, us, cast their vote. We, the educated citizens of the country believe in the power of voting to drive extraordinary social and economic change. There is a great potential for people to use their vote to improve their livelihoods, but it must be properly harnessed – incorporated into each community’s social, cultural, historic, economic and political context.
Human development is about people: their desire and struggle to uphold their dignity, expand their freedoms and lead lives that they value. In this quest, choosing the right team to lead plays a key role; people work to earn their livelihood, improve their lifestyle and infrastructure, ensure safety and security, create relevant future-oriented institutions and governance in the complex circumstances that poverty, alienation, and voicelessness create.
Given this backdrop, “Let’s Vote” initiative is being launched to help the citizens of our resource-rich nation to find their voice, exercise their right, thus enabling them access the resources that contribute to positive development outcomes. Several likeminded professionals and corporate leaders have come together to get this initiative kick start and cascade across various organizations.

Dr. Abdul Kalam's Speech - A must read

I know this is too long and we all have too lil time....but this is too good. So true. Look into yourself. Read on....
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Why is the media here so negative?
Why are we in India so embarrassed to recognize our own strengths, our achievements?We are such a great nation. We have so many amazing success stories but we refuse to acknowledge them. Why?We are the first in milk production.We are number one in Remote sensing satellites.We are the second largest producer of wheat.We are the second largest producer of rice.Look at Dr. Sudarshan , he has transferred the tribal village into a self-sustaining, self-driving unit. There are millions of such achievements but our media is only obsessed in the bad news and failures and disasters.I was in Tel Aviv once and I was reading the Israeli newspaper. It was the day after a lot of attacks and bombardments and deaths had taken place. The Hamas had struck. But the front page of the newspaper had the picture of a Jewish gentleman who in five years had transformed his desert into an orchid and a granary. It was this inspiring picture th everyone woke up to. The gory details of killings, bombardments, deaths, were inside in the newspaper, buried among other news.
In India we only read about death, sickness, terrorism, crime.. Why are we so NEGATIVE? Another question: Why are we, as a nation so obsessed with foreign things? We want foreign T.Vs, we want foreign shirts. We want foreign technology.
Why this obsession with everything imported. Do we not realize that self-respect comes with self-reliance? I was in Hyderabad giving this lecture, when a 14 year old girl asked me for my autograph. I asked her what her goal in life is. She replied: I want to live in a developed India . For her, you and I will have to build this developed India You must proclaim. India is not an under-developed nation; it is a highly developed nation.Do you have 10 minutes? Allow me to come back with a vengeance.
YOU say that our government is inefficient.YOU say that our laws are too old.YOU say that the municipality does not pick up the garbage.YOU say that the phones don't work, the railways are a joke. The airline is the worst in the world, mails never reach their destination. YOU say that our country has been fed to the dogs and is the absolute pits.
YOU say, say and say. What do YOU do about it?
Take a person on his way to Singapore. Give him a name - 'YOURS'. Give him a face - 'YOURS'. YOU walk out of the airport and you are at your International best. In Singapore you don't throw cigarette butts on the roads or eat in the stores. YOU are as proud of their Underground links as they are. You pay $5 (approx. Rs. 60) to drive through Orchard Road (equivalent of Mahim Causeway or Pedder Road) between 5 PM and 8 PM. YOU come back to the parking lot to punch your parking ticket if you have over stayed in a restaurant or a shopping mall irrespective of your status identity… In Singapore you don't say anything, DO YOU? YOU wouldn't dare to eat in public during Ramadan, in Dubai YOU would not dare to go out without your head covered in Jeddah.YOU would not dare to buy an employee of the telephone exchange in London at 10 pounds (Rs.650) a month to, 'see to it that my STD and ISD calls are billed to someone else.'YOU would not dare to speed beyond 55 mph (88 km/h) in Washington and then tell the traffic cop, 'Jaanta hai main kaun hoon (Do you know who I am?). I am so and so's son. Take your two bucks and get lost.' YOU wouldn't chuck an empty coconut shell anywhere other than the garbage pail on the beaches in Australia and New Zealand Why don't YOU spit Paan on the streets of Tokyo? Why don't YOU use examination jockeys or buy fake certificates in Boston??? We are still talking of the same YOU. YOU who can respect and conform to a foreign system in other countries but cannot in your own. You who will throw papers and cigarettes on the road the moment you touch Indian ground. If you can be an involved and appreciative citizen in an alien country, why cannot you be the same here in India?
Once in an interview, the famous Ex-municipal commissioner of Bombay, Mr. Tinaikar, had a point to make. 'Rich people's dogs are walked on the streets to leave their affluent droppings all over the place,' he said. 'And then the same people turn around to criticize and blame the authorities for inefficiency and dirty pavements. What do they expect the officers to do? Go down with a broom every time their dog feels the pressure in his bowels?In America every dog owner has to clean up after his pet has done the job. Same in Japan.Will the Indian citizen do that here?' He's right. We go to the polls to choose a government and after that forfeit all responsibility.We sit back wanting to be pampered and expect the government to do everything for us whilst our contribution is totally negative. We expect the government to clean up but we are not going to stop chucking garbage all over the place nor are we going to stop to pick a up a stray piece of paper and throw it in the bin. We expect the railways to provide clean bathrooms but we are not going to learn the proper use of bathrooms.We want Indian Airlines and Air India to provide the best of food and toiletries but we are not going to stop pilfering at the least opportunity.This applies even to the staff who is known not to pass on the service to the public.
When it comes to burning social issues like those related to women, dowry, girl child! and others, we make loud drawing room protestations and continue to do the reverse at home. Our excuse? 'It's the whole system which has to change, how will it matter if I alone forego my sons' rights to a dowry.' So who's going to change the system?What does a system consist of? Very conveniently for us it consists of our neighbours, other households, other cities, other communities and the government. But definitely not me and YOU. When it comes to us actually making a positive contribution to the system we lock ourselves along with our families into a safe cocoon and look into the distance at countries far away and wait for a Mr.Clean to come along & work miracles for us with a majestic sweep of his hand or we leave the country and run away.Like lazy cowards hounded by our fears we run to America to bask in their glory and praise their system. When New York becomes insecure we run to England When England experiences unemployment, we take the next flight out to the Gulf. When the Gulf is war struck, we demand to be rescued and brought home by the Indian government. Everybody is out to abuse and rape the country. Nobody thinks of feeding the system. Our conscience is mortgaged to money.
'ASK WHAT WE CAN DO FOR INDIA AND DO WHAT HAS TO BE DONE TO MAKE INDIA WHAT AMERICA AND OTHER WESTERN COUNTRIES ARE TODAY'
Lets do what India needs from us.

"Not My Job Award" goes to High way maintaince department